Faith Leon Über Alles
80 Photos + Video
Everyone believes in something. Seriously. Agnostics believe as devoutly as any religion. Cleveland fans believe “this will be the year” before every season. At a core level, you see, Faith defines the human condition. Granted it seems like most philosophic ruminations do not mean precisely Faith Leon, but we figure that’s just because they never got a chance to meet her.
While we have been singing Faith’s praises as a person for years, we did not mean to leave the implication that as a performer she falls short in any way at all. We felt it appropriate on this Day of Faith to correct any misapprehension for which we may have been responsible. The episode today should dispel any hint of that oversight on our part, as it takes a special quality of actress to pull off the line, “You look really hot. Do you want to come in?”
Sorry to say folks, and be warned, they LITERALLY do the Pizza Delivery Man shtick here.
At the risk of dating our analyst: EGADS!
Then again, if you look like Faith Leon, maybe it doesn’t matter. You can even leave the blinds and the front door open. You can fade to a Blue Highlight video effect that works great in stills but falls very, very short in video unless you specifically shoot with that in mind for post. You can have a Christmas tree in the background of perhaps the least festive room ever conceived. … No problem.
You see, if you have Faith — as we have learned — anything becomes possible. Legs for days; lips for years, and eyes for eons. And you want to know the most wonderful thing? She’s even smarter than she is beautiful, and THAT makes us laugh. It also reaffirms an ultimate belief in the value of FAITH on this special day. (Hey, relax. God invented sex too. It didn’t have to be such great fun, you know. If He spent all his time throwing lightning bolts at people having consensual adult fun, He’d never have time to chuckle at Cleveland fans.)
Easter falling on April Fool’s day? That just means Catholics can be funny too. We all benefit from thinking about the logical conclusions of our actions, though. It would be best to remember that.
If you aim for the high road of peace, love, and benevolence and end up being wrong about some “meaning” after death, well, you were too good of a person as it turns out. If that ends up being the worst thing someone can say about you, it sounds like you win to us. If, however, you always aim low in life, and you end up being wrong … well, that sounds unpleasant.